Texas Toast?

     So, apparently there is a gubernatorial candidate in the state of Texas who is running on a platform of secession. (You read that correctly.) Now, as I recall from my Texas history -- which was a state requirement for the 4th grade curriculum when I lived there in 1969 (San Antonio, in case you're curious), Texas was originally a part of Mexico and content to be so . . . until the Mexican government abolished slavery. Since their economy at that time was dependent on slave labor, Texans went to war with Mexico for independence, won the war, and became an independent republic. When that didn't work out so well, they joined the United States and proudly flew the stars and stripes . . . until Abraham Lincoln won the presidential election of 1860, causing South Carolina to secede from the Union. Not wanting to be left out, Texas seceded along with the rest of the South and joined the Confederate States of America, proudly fighting for states' rights. Which was just great . . . until the South lost the war. Texas, along with the rest of the southern states, was reinstated and, we assume, content with that status . . . until 2008 when Barack Obama was elected president.

     Now the states' rights issue has come up again. This time it's about the state's right to refuse any kind of federal assistance, be it for health care, education, disaster relief, jobs, police protection, fire protection, animal control, farm subsidies, (insert your own here) . . . If the federal goverment wants to pay for it, then at least one candidate for the governorship of Texas wants the right to reject it. Because God forbid they should accept any help from "socialists!" In fact, God probably WANTS Texas to secede and go it alone. Hey, they've done it before -- at least twice by my count.  They even have a state nickname and a flag all ready to go.  It's like "Sovereignty In A Box!"

     Well, who am I to argue? After all, they've been advertising themselves for years as "A Whole Other Country." I'm sure they have enough private industry to handle emergency relief the next time the Texas coast gets hit by a hurricane.  I'm relatively sure the member schools of the Big 12 North wouldn't miss them (hey, can we toss in O.U., too?  Couldn't hurt to ask). And yeah, I suppose gas prices would go up a little, since we'd suddenly be importing foreign oil. But we already do that, so what's the difference? The only downside I can see is that, without Texas, Kansas would go back to being the state with the most crazies. But that's a small price to pay -- and we DO have government funded mental health programs here.

     Fair enough.  If Texas wants to secede, I say let 'em . . . as long as they take Dick Cheney with them. But please, MAKE UP YOUR MINDS, Y'All!  And hey -- Don't let the door hit 'ya on the way out.